We often feel things going out of hand in our personal and professional life. I was going through one such turmoil and came across this article motivating me to keep going.
Everyone loves inspiring beginnings and happy endings; it is just the middles that involve hard work. You often end up sailing through alone in the middle.
I have been working away from my home town for over a decade now since my bachelor days. An initial thought of heeding back to home town was exciting. While the job market in my home town isn't as bright as where I live now, yet to my sane mind it made lots of sense.
At 35, I started leaning more towards stable and peaceful life than aggressively chasing career. I value spending time with my daughter more than the time at work and money it pays.
I wanted to practise what i preach to my daughter. Family comes ahead of anything else, and your job is just a supporting element to fulfil the needs of your family. I felt a moral responsibility to my wife's parents and support them during their old age.
All these thoughts inspired me to take 2 major decisions in my life
Step down from Management career path and take up an individual contributor role, which would give me more control and freedom of how I spend my time.
Move to home town where my family belongs.
As easy and rosy as it seems, it's a path less travelled. You hold yourself solely accountable for the outcomes.
Your friends and family don't appreciate the values you stick on to. More disheartening was my own parents never express gratitude while they see for themselves how people of their same age group are left stranded by their own kids. I noticed everyone to be non-committal so that they aren't held accountable if outcome turns out unsatisfactory.
I was in the middle of chaos and uncertainty to shift job and daughter's school, find a house to stay across city (in the middle of COVID-19 pandemic coupled with lockdowns). While no one appreciates what you are doing, Is it even worth the strain?
Seeking recognition is clearly a path down the drain. You are solely responsible for your actions, and it's outcomes. I told my self, my actions are the outcome of the values I believe in since my childhood. I tend to re-collect the golden words from founder of Amazon, Jeff Bezos
“All of my best decisions in business and in life have been made with heart, intuition, guts… not analysis.”
I decided to short list my options (Job, school, house etc) with facts and data I had at that point in time and the final call was purely a decision from heart and not the rational mind. As once a wise man said,
No decision is right or wrong. It’s just a decision you take at that point of time with the inputs you have.
Outcomes are only as good as the inputs. I decided to execute with confidence ensuring my decisions were 2 way doors where ever possible.
It definitely seems like a failure in the middle and the end is subjective to what you perceive as success and failure.
"More disheartening was my own parents never express gratitude while they see for themselves how people of their same age group are left stranded by their own kids."
This hit me. People (of all age) are very quick to give advice but if asked to coach and be held accountable, its rare to find such gems.